Estate Clean Outs - What You Need to Know
Cleaning out an estate is a tiring process, both emotionally and physically. When you’ve lost a loved one, the last thing on your mind is going through their stuff, but it’s an important process for everyone involved. Not only are you working through what’s left of your loved one’s legacy, but you’re working on gaining closure for yourself and your family as well. Before you begin, keep these things in mind:
Estate Clean Outs Take Time
Cleaning out an estate is not just about organizing - it’s about making important decisions regarding what your loved one has left behind and how the family distributes their belongings. While you’ll be tasked with cleaning, donating, and sorting through the contents of their estate, remember that this is a process that will take time. Even if you’re working with a physical deadline (such as the sale of a house), emotionally you will need time to process and reflect, and that’s okay. You don’t have to finish everything at once. As you sort through everything, let yourself take breaks, share memories with your family, and give yourself space to feel everything. You wouldn’t clean your own house in one day; don’t try and do it here.
Working Together on Estate Clean Outs Is Better
As with any large project, it can be tempting to try and take on the bulk of the work on your own. Having control over some small bit of a largely uncontrollable situation is comforting. This, however, is a time to work together. Bringing family members and even friends to help you sort through an estate and make decisions about your loved one’s belongings can be immensely helpful in staying on track, as well as providing emotional support through a difficult time. This is especially important if you are planning an estate sale or there are a lot of things to go through. It’s a much longer and lonelier process to do alone and having someone around to help can make it easier to deal with.
Organize Using the Tools You Have
Organizing an estate is different from traditional decluttering and organizing. A lot of what you’re going through and what happens to the items you sort is out of your hands. If it’s helpful, plan for yourself based on what you know you need to sort through and what you’re expecting to deal with. If you know the house is going to be cleaned, figure out when that needs to be done (does the house need to be emptied first? Will it be professionally cleaned or will you take it on?). After that, give yourself time to go through each room. If you know certain items have been willed to someone, set those aside somewhere you won’t lose them in the shuffle. You can decide everything else; do you or someone else in the family want it, or should it be donated or thrown out? As you make these decisions, it’s okay to take time to process the emotions and memories involved.
Estate Clean Outs Can Be a Positive Experience
Cleaning out an estate can obviously bring up a lot of emotions and memories, but that doesn’t mean those will be all bad. It’s okay to embrace the positive emotions too - whether you find something interesting in the estate, stumble upon fond memories, or simply have a good laugh from time to time. Maybe you will find an old, unopened black and white TV in the attic and spend hours wondering what it could be doing up there. This can be an opportunity to share family history with children and tell stories from when your loved one was alive. Whatever it is, give yourself the opportunity to find joy throughout the day as well. The estate can be an opportunity to celebrate the life of your loved one as well as mourn.
Whatever your estate timeline is, take your time. Give yourself the emotional and physical space to work through everything and accomplish your goals. It’s okay if it takes longer or shorter than you expect - there’s no one-size fits all. While you want to ensure that you are organized and everything is processed, you also need to make sure you’re taking care of you and your family through this time. Although it will be different for everyone, understanding what to expect can help you prepare and gather everything you need to make this a smooth transition for you and your family.